Road Trip Through Friendships

So when a friend randomly tells you she has a condo in Orlando and there is space for whoever wants to come…well, you see where this is going.

So guess who gets to squeeze in a bonus trip to Disney next week-THATS RIGHT! WE DO!

Excited? Nah, not us! 🙂

This time next week we will be soaking up that Florida sun in matching shirts on Mainstream, USA. Ecstatic describes it better.

Am I writing this to rub it in? No. I mean it may seem that way but it isn’t. It’s to take a moment and tell you how healthy my friendships are right now. Rubbing it in? No. It’s to encourage you if you aren’t to this spot in life yet or to rejoice with you in something you may not realize about your own friendships.

You see, yesterday I had a friend who needed something because she was sick and I was overjoyed that I was able to be the hero for her. A hero (minus the cape) who flew in with Sprite, gummy sour worms and ramen noodles. Odd combo, yes, but it is what the doctor ordered. I stopped for a moment to say hello, give her a hug and supplies and also talk about books….because that is how this friend rolls. Later she text me an eloquent message about friendship and a phrase stuck out to me about what she said. She told me she was “in awe” of the gift I have in my friendships. I value her words more than she will probably ever realize, but it was a realization that I needed deeply.

Monday I had my best friend from first grade come to the farm to hang out for the first time. It was perfect. Our children played, we ate chicken nuggets and our hearts reconnected. We never had a falling out, we just had been so busy that we hadn’t had a chance to get together and spend time together talking. We needed it. And I basked in it. I also received texts from 2 other friends-friends that are in completely different seasons of life and our friendships are on completely different playing fields from one another.

Tuesday I was able to bring aforementioned friend her sick supplies and later that evening I had a girls night with a friend that lasted well into the morning with good conversation and plenty of laughs. It was fantastic!

Sometimes we struggle with friendships. We just don’t have the time to invest in each other for whatever reason. We can’t do lunch dates because money is tight, we can’t make the drive to see each other because of time, or we just don’t have the oomph to put forth effort. That sounds terrible, but it’s just plain old honesty.

It isn’t healthy though.

You see, we all have these different times in our lives and more than we even realize, especially as women, we need to have a tribe to lean on. We have moved away from appreciating our tribe more and more. We don’t raise our children in a village because the village is too dang judgmental. Who wants to ask for help with something or share their troubles with someone who is going to hold it over your head for years to come?

Put your hand down, Karen. You’re lying.

Those are not friends.

But we have to be willing to find the people who are our friends. The ones who will be by our side in all of those times.  They may be judgmental (which for some reason is a negative term) but it’s because we have given them permission into those parts of our lives. And we need that, people! We need the friend that knows us well enough to step in and take the reigns sometimes because we are bursting at the seams, or because we are completely in over our heads or because we just need to shut our mouth and step back. Thats not being judgmental, its being real. Without those people and without that trust we can’t be successful. We will continuously question ourselves because we don’t have that edification and reassurance. We will fall apart because we don’t have the support we need. We will fail because we were not designed to sustain alone.

I love that I have this smorgasbord of friends that I can call for different reasons. And I know that it is safe and it is beautiful and it is a Godsend. I have always had a few close friends but there is something about getting to the age where you can truly appreciate it in its fullness. You realize how grateful you really are for people that love you for who you are and don’t want to do life without you. The ones that you can go straight in the door without knocking or straight to the fridge. The ones that you have inside jokes with and plenty of stories to laugh your guts out over. The ones that you can unhinge and let go with. The ones that will hurt you at some point too, but you know that it’s still worth pursuing them in their own struggles to make sure you don’t lose.

The ones you love.

The ones that love you.

You. Not your job, your skills, your hobbies. You. In all your messy, craziness.

That’s pretty special. So make times for them. Be grateful for them. Meet them where they are because you know they will meet you in the same place no matter the sacrifice.

And if you find one that invites you to Disney randomly. That’s a magical diamond in the rough so keep that one for sure!

friends4
Throwing it back old school
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Many years together
friends
Definition of a tribe

 

xoxo

Christina

 

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